The Super Abbreviated Story of the Pete Sampras Chicken
(which is actually up for a Short Story "Poolitzer" Prize)

By Hans while talking on phone to Shauna who is wife of and relayed messages from Rubber Chicken Recruiting Superstar Craig Williams

(Craig has actually recruited several sports chickens to boot and won't retire from sports chicken recruiting anytime soon, cause he doesn't do it for the money. )

Pete Sampras is Craig's sister's husband's daughter's husband's brother. For those who can't follow, Pete Sampras's brother is married to Craig's Neice. I think that is how it works out. Craig gave the brother the chicken, who gave it to Pete, who signed it, who gave it back to the brother, who gave it back to Craig, potentially winessed by Craig's Sister, Craig's sister's husband, and Craig's sister's husband's daughter.

(Justin has a headache trying to figure out this family tree.)

Shauna, Craig's wife, also says, "Pete is a pretty decent, cool, guy."

Editor's note: This story, had it been told directly by Craig would been two sentences at most. But Hans got hold of it. Enough said.